Park Life: Sweaty Hackysack Guy

Oh God, every park has this toolbox dude kicking around. Did I miss a memo? Do you need to have one of these champs on display to qualify for park funding from the state?

He is harmless, for the most part, but becomes severely grating when he's either drunk or stoned. He'll bring his own boombox to the park and blast something cliche like Bob Marley or Sublime. Sometimes he'll just tune in to the radio, which will further catapult him into public nuisance-land.

If this guy were an action figure, he'd come with douchey wraparound shades, a Jeep and a sunburn.