April 14, 2010

Things In His House That Make Me Sad: A Clackity Dell Desktop

Oh my god, I hate your computer. No one owns a Dell on purpose unless you're an NYU student in 1997. Just typing my username into Gmail feels like I'm playing a sticky instrument. Ewwww!

Does this piece of shit only run Internet Explorer? What, do you have a Yahoo! toolbar too? I feel like I'm at a temp job using this thing. I'm trying to check my email and I keep getting these flashing alerts about Norton being expired. I hate this!

This must have been a hand-me-down from an uncle or something. Maybe it was swiped off a curb after someone tossed it. There's no way that you walked into a store and willingly purchased this machine in the past five years. Tell me that you didn't willingly purchase this.

Don't give me that look. I'm not a computer snob, I swear. But, if the computer world was likened to transportation, using this computer feels like taking a Greyhound bus cross-county with no pee breaks allowed. It's just gross.

13 comments:

Phil said...

DUDE!

Jamie said...

Hahaha, kudos for this one

Anonymous said...

I totally dated a guy who had a desktop. But thankfully, he had a laptop too. He used the desktop only for "Word." I was like, "Seriously, dude. Spend the money and put Mircrosoft Word on your laptop and get rid of that ugly dust collector in your bedroom."

Allan Smitheel said...

I'm currently at "work" writing my comment using a Dell.

Um, no, I don't have a Dell at home.

Actually don't have a computer... don't have a television... don't have a phone.

Why yes! My transistor radio does use two AAA batteries.

seriously.

Julia Hays said...

I have a Dell at work and at home. I'm so ashamed.

Drew said...

Anna, you have very specific computer requirements for the men you date.
What if the Dell desktop is on a table big enough for you to put your beer down?

Anna said...

Drew, I do. It's the cross I bear.

That'd be cool if I could put my beer down on a table near it, but that Dell ain't gonna blow my hair back.

Anonymous said...

Not everyone can afford a MacBook.

Michaelangelo said...

Hear hear

Anonymous said...

I love how the post under this is "Elaborate and Bizarre Computer Setups"

It's amazing how you can find a way to complain about fucking everything when you have a blog.

Anna said...

It is amazing! I agree!!

Anonymous said...

MacBook... a real sack of shit!

BigMikeyOcho said...

HP at work, custom built machine at home. If it's one thing the wife loves, it's her own personal tech guy.

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