From our reader
Rich, who is
really being a bad boyfriend here:
It's Saturday morning and we're laying in bed watching Say Anything or maybe re-watching the second season of the U.S. version of the Office because that season is frickin' awesome. Around noon we decide to grab brunch at that little breakfast place a few blocks away that you like so much. Afterward, we decide to go to the record store and look around a bit and that is where I ruin the entire day.
I bring my stack of records up to the counter and exchange pleasantries with the girl working the register. As she's ringing me up, she makes a comment about the Cherry Valance album I picked up for 3 bucks. In turn, I compliment her for choosing to play The Gun Club's "Fire of Love" in the store.
From there we somehow get to talking about how each of us were at the MC5 show that Evan Dando played with them a few years back and how we both think "New Wind" by 7 Seconds is a highly underrated album. I'm laughing and agreeing with pretty much everything she says, and even as she keeps glancing over at you silently standing next to me, I make no effort to leave. I'm throwing some of my best game at her and even though you're right there, she's going with it.
This goes on for probably longer than a transaction for four records should take, but I'm enjoying talking to a cute girl that has the same musical taste that I do (no offense to you, but I can only listen to The Beastie Boys and White Stripes so many times before I go crazy). We finally leave but not before I mention to her that I deejay Monday nights at the dive bar down the street and that she should bring some records down sometime, maybe do a guest spot.
Of course we get in an argument on the way home and eventually I apologize for being a dick. Everything is cool again--until we go to the bar that night and I openly flirt with the girl working the door.
Holy shit, you ARE a bad boyfriend. Are you wearing a "What Would John Mayer Do?" bracelet? Because I feel that is something that he would do. Um, yeah, good luck with that.
9 comments:
To the guy who sent this in (I HOPE that you see this):
God you have no idea how hurtful that is! You need to stop! Every taken person enjoys harmless flirting once in a while to know that they're still wanted by others, but you should not do it in front of your girlfriend, nor should you take it that far. How would you like it if she does it to you? Jesus if you realize that it's bad behavior, why don't you stop? Just because you sent this e-mail in and "confess," doesn't mean that you're forgiven.
Yeah, I've done this too. But I'm a chick, so I was making eyes at the awkward pasty record shop dude with the pants that are slightly too short.
But you know what, similar taste in music is really insufficient compatibility for a relationship. Because although it may be fun to play the "hey we have the same favorite records!" thing for bit, you eventually realize FUCK this guy is a pretentious narcissist who rarely smiles and whose idea of a good time involves philosophizing about krautrock and creeping on other chicks.
Ladies. Let's reel it back in for a second. This isn't a therapist's office. This is a blog...about dating nonetheless, and I'm sorry but I see this as nothing other than a light hearted submission from a reader to be taken in good humor.
Who hasn't dated or been out with a guy that flirts with other girls every now and then? Honestly, if you say you have never flirted with another guy (be it bartender, or waiter...or even record store clerk) while out with your significant other you are lying to yourself. Tried to score a free drink at the bar? Get that waiter to pay special attention to you? Tried to get into the rock show for free with an extra smile at the door guys stupid jokes...exactly.
Do i agree that there is a time and a place for said flirting? Absolutely...but let's not make this guy the whipping boy. Okay?
Yeah, you are a terrible boyfriend. Everyone flirts, but you might want to rein that shit in while your significant other is STANDING NEXT TO YOU.
uh, actually i dated a dj (hiss! spit!) who seemed to think flirting with other girls was ok. the biggest difference between he and the "fictional character" in your story was that he was unapologetic about his faux pas. so yes, i think the people who have reacted strongly to this story probably do so because they've been with someone who really is that much of a d-bag.
(side note: never date a dj. seriously.)
It's okay Rich. I'm sure your girlfriend does the same thing behind your back with the cute cashier at Starbucks or the Urban Outfitters employee that we asked for a size 6 for in a pair of Dunks!
Some of us menfolk know that most of y'all ladies want validation that your man is desirable and what better way to demonstrate this than being desirable in front of you to someone you might (maybe, vaguely) feel threatened by?
Yikes, that's so true I can't help to wonder if Dennis Reynolds ever said it.
Another problem, of this same vein, is the situation of the OVER jealous girlfriend. You know the type, your girlfriend is insanely jealous and thinks anytime you're exchanging pleasantries with someone of the opposite sex you MUST me attempting to fuck them. This is one case where I will not apologize; I know I've done nothing wrong and I'm merely being sociable. It's a slippery slope and a big 'red flag' when I see a woman do this.
I would totally dump your ass, on the spot. It doesn't even matter if you aren't exclusive; when you are on a date with someone, you are THEIR escort, and should have enough respect and common decency to behave yourself as such. You couldn't keep it in your pants 'til you were alone? Ricockulous.
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