I Love Love Love His Hidden Circus Talents

From Liz, who likes it when he busts out a juggle from time to time.

Jugglers do it with their balls in the air

When I first met this guy, he was reserved and quiet. He didn't speak up much in groups and seemed a little deer-in-the-headlights-ish when I spoke to him. But since I too am a Squirrel Whisperer, I knew it was only a matter of time before he revealed his true self.

So I was delighted when he unveiled his alter-ego: an adorably talented circus performer. After admitting that his first job was as a kids' gymnastics teacher, he executed a perfect roundoff in the street outside the bar. Then he casually mentioned doing a backflip later. Holy shit, dude! Not just anyone can do a backflip. That's a talent normally reserved for dolphins and tiny, muscular females.

Is he secretly Dominique Dawes? (Please forgive the outdated gymnastics reference.) Thankfully, this guy is neither a sea-dwelling mammal nor a 1990s floor routine expert; he's a normal sized human male who can apparently twist his body into impressive contortions!

Then next layer of his squirreliness (squirrelitude?) peeled away the day we went to the grocery store together. I asked him to grab me a few clementines, and from across the produce section I saw him toss three into the air and juggled 'em for a few seconds before dropping them. His sheepish smile as he jogged over to pick up the fruit melted my heart. He looked like a puppy, you know how they sit and then get up and then sit again and wag their tails, because they're just too eager to impress you? His juggling skills were just his way of saying that beneath the squirrely exterior lies a guy with talents and abilities to spare.

Dudes, your hidden circus-like talents knock my socks off. Biggest ladyboner ever. While I struggle with sun salutation and downward dog, you have physical abilities that the general public can only dream of. Let me know when you want to come over and...ahem...practice stretching?

It's funny because I actually stand on the other side of the circus talents debate. I gotta say, my favorite kind of tumbler is the kind full of whiskey and ice. However, the way you described him juggling at the supermarket did make my icy heart melt too. It's pretty cute in a Tom-Hanks-in-Big sorta way. I'll give you that.